version 2.0

Hello dearest Foxs Lane friends,

About an hour and a half ago, just as I’d typed the last words on my blog and was about to scroll to the top and reread it, I somehow pressed something I shouldn’t have and deleted my entire post. I have no idea how I did it and I have no idea how to get it all back. I’ve been trying absolutely everything in the world I can think of since it happened, and it’s just not there. It’s nowhere. It’s time to give up and let it go.

I’m so upset. I’m upset because I spent so long putting it together in the first place, and I’m doubly upset because I’ve struggled thinking about how to talk about some of the things that have been going on lately and I don’t think I have the energy or the clarity to do it again.

I do know that I’ve had a really crappy start to the year and I began my last version of this blog by thanking you for waiting for me while I couldn’t blog, and for the kind messages I received.

So far this year we’ve had weeks in isolation, we’ve had two cases of Covid in our house, we’ve had gastro, we’ve had to organise an overseas trip in about three weeks, we’ve had to farewell our beautiful Jarrah for a year, and we’ve had to deal with the chaos and anxiety that seems to be part of everyday life these days.

And then out of nowhere in early January, I discovered what we thought was a really serious health issue. In between all of the appointments and the advice, and the tests, and the googling, while we waited for the results, I went to the darkest places I’ve ever been to. It was a nightmare few weeks for everyone closest to me. I hardly slept, I hardly ate, I cried all the time and I listened to the doctors who told me how bad it looked and I believed them. But eventually the results started coming in and by some miracle so far they are clear. There’s still the possibility of some final testing in a few months but I’m hopeful this time that it’s all going to be okay.

I wrote this so much more eloquently last time, I’m so upset.

One day, hopefully before too long, while I still remember the details, I’d like to write the whole story. For the record and because I think it’s a good story. But for now it still feels too raw, my head feels too foggy from the emotions and I’m still not ready for it all to be out there in the big wide world.

It’s weird, you’d think that after getting such great results so far that I’d be over the moon, jumping up and down with a new lease on life. But for some reason I feel the opposite. I’m exhausted and foggy and teary. I hope that I can move through this stage soon, I’ve got so much to catch up on. But I know that I have to honour my true feelings and work through what just happened quietly and give it the time it needs.

Therefore, because of the fogginess and the fatigue, and because it’s my first blog post back in a while and I feel a bit rusty, I’m going to make this one heavy in photos and light in words. I hope you enjoy it.

Over the past few weeks we ate lots of dinners and drank lots of cocktails to celebrate and farewell ourJarrah who left on an airplane last Tuesday. We’re all so excited for her adventures, we’re in awe of her bravery and to be honest I think we’re all a little bit jealous too. Have a brilliant time Jazzy and please share some photos and stories with us from time to time. xx

I always feel like it’s a true sign of midsummer when the scarlet-runner-bean vines reach the top of the tee-pee.

This week our garden has been feeding us cucumbers, zucchinis, broccoli, lettuces, blackberries, strawberries, herbs, broad beans and other varieties of beans too.

We’ve been picking beautiful big bunches of blooms.

Which is lucky because my kiln finally arrived and we’ve found ourselves with an abundance of vases.

The tomatoes are still a way off, but the wood-chipped paths are bringing me so much joy.

I’m reading Elizabeth Day’s Magpie. I’ve only read about 40 pages but so far I’m really enjoying it.

I’ve read 11 books so far this year, most of them light and easy. Because of my state of mind that’s all I can cope with, except for my favourite of them The Labyrinth by Amanda Lohrey, which is neither but still incredibly atmospheric and emotional..

I still haven’t finished knitting my Cloudberry Tee. Obviously summer time and knitting don’t go together for me. But I have finished one of the sleeves and feel happy that the little flower motif is as sweet as I’d hoped it would be. I still have the other sleeve and the neckline to knit. Hopefully I’ll get them done while it’s still warm enough for short sleeves.

I really want to talk to you more about my book Vantastic. It’s such a great book and I’m so proud of it. I think I’ll have to write. a whole post about it soon, but in the meantime -

Here’s the table of contents -

Learning to speak van and RV

Before you set off

Vanlife

Food on the move

Crafting and mindfulness

Traveling with kids

Heading home

It’s packed full of photos and stories and lists and instructions and suggestions and plans and recipes and projects.

It’s available to buy right now in shops all over Australia, the US and Canada

It will be released on the 17th of February in the UK and Europe.

And can be ordered online from anywhere in the world by clicking this link - Vantastic!

Which brings me to the place that I finished and then lost it all last time. In version 1.0. I still haven’t managed to tell the stories as well as I did the first time, but Bren just came in and said he’s tried and failed everything he can think of and it’s definitely gone. I’ve tried, I’ve cried, he’s tried and now I have no choice but to publish this version and move on.

I want to send extra love this week to anyone whose struggling at the moment. I see you and my heart hurts for you. I hope you find a glimmer of sunshine soon. I’m so, so sorry.

Before you click away I’d love it if you would share something good with us. Anything at all. A story of something that made you feel happy, something you made, someone you met, something you cooked, or bought, or heard, or thought. I feel like so many of us could do with an extra shot of goodness in our lives right now.

Here’s mine - a couple of days ago Pepper invented the most delicious sandwich and this is how it’s made. Take one cucumber and slice it lengthwise. Place one slice of tomato and one slice of cheese or feta on one of the cucumber halves. Sprinkle with salt, and then place the other half on top. It’s delicious! Then eat. The perfect amount of flavour and crunch. Yum!

See you next week, hopefully without all the dramas.

Love,

Kate x